An internal search

So this morning, I woke up at 6 am, lying in between my husband and my baby girl. I look to Willow who is sound asleep and I smile at how precious she looks lying there, with her hands near her face trying to hold her pacifier in! And as I look at her, I become completely overwhelmed with thoughts and emotions. It wasn't too long ago that I was still angry that I was pregnant, and how I was supposed to be working on finishing school not raising another child. Then to top it off she had to decide to be born on Dec. 24th which forced us to spend Christmas in the hospital!
But as I look at my daughter, my little Willow, who is the one child who is a nursing champ, the one who made me decide to cloth diaper, the one who is grounding me. I can not help but cry. She needs me as a newborn as much as I need her to see my family again and what my role as a mom is. I can not help but still sit here and cry hours later as she sits in her swing asleep.
I am not sure why now this is all hitting me, as she is approaching the 2 month mark in her life adventure, but it is. And I am okay with it. We may not always know the reason God gave us something at the time, but sometimes He will show you little glimpses of the path. Thank you.


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